Empress Series - I Am Still Me but Someone Else

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Empress Series - I Am Still Me but Someone Else

Postby Miki Yamuri » Sat Jul 05, 2014 5:11 pm

I Am Still Me but Someone Else


I am Princess Amy Michelle Anton, Daughter of the Emperor of the Known Universe.
This is the story of my death ... and rebirth.

I have memories of the accident, though they are not complete. It began on my eighteenth birthday. Mom had dressed me in my favorite romper for the space flight. Dad wanted me to go with him so we wouldn’t be separated. It would be a very long journey through space. I was to be interfaced with the dream machine so I would be occupied for the many years travel at light speed. The Dream Machine had the ability to create real seeming scenarios for any type of simulation or fantasy that could be conceived by the mind of man. It maintained the body in a state of suspended animation. It was used for long duration, deep space travel.

Before being interfaced with the machine, Dad gave me an injection of some kind that made me feel real strange for a few minutes. Dad told me he had just given me a prolongation shot and I would be an eighteen year old baby for a very long time, and laughed. When the strange feelings had cleared, I was interfaced into a wonderful dream fantasy every little girl would love. It seemed like it was real and I really enjoyed it. I skipped off into a magic forest filled with Fairies, Elves, and Unicorns.

There are excessive safeguards built into this machine to prevent what happened from happening. Not all things can be foreseen and this was a freak accident that hadn’t ever happened in 10,000 years of space travel.

I didn’t know what caused what happened. I did know that a major failure to the machine I was interfaced with had occurred. I heard the warnings loud and clear as the cascade failure began. All nanotechnology and the massively inherent safety it provided malfunctioned. It was impossible for this to happen, for the fabric of reality wouldn’t allow it. It had happened mysteriously, and I knew there was no way out. The safety systems no longer existed. I knew with no doubt I was going to die. My very existence was slowly and painfully torn apart before the sudden empty insane icy cold darkness of oblivion took me.

Someone Else

My name is John Tressu. I am an out doors type who loves to hunt and hike and those sorts of things. On this particular day, I was deep in the wilderness on a live off the land type of adventure. I do this a lot.

Today is a very good day. I stand on a cliff and look over the valley below. The view is spectacular. The sun has just broke over the mountain behind me. I can see soft fluffy clouds drifting all along the valley floor far below. The smell of the mountain is clean and filled with fresh invigorating smells. Dew has made everything glisten ... and also caused my shoes to be wet. I don’t mind in the least.

I string my bow. My intention was to follow the deer trail to the bottom of the cliff and set up a blind at the bend where the animals would have to pass to reach the stream. I know that sometime a deer or goat can be surprised on the trail down. I am ready.

I carefully begin my decent along the extremely twisty narrow trail. It is good fortune that there is little debris on the trail and the footing is solid.

I hear a loud screaming noise. It screamed like a soul in torment as it missed the top of the hill where I was standing, thank goodness. A strange type of aircraft screamed over my head and made a rather bad controlled crash landing in the valley below.

I feel huge amounts of air rushing past me. I almost get knocked over by the blast. It would have been fatal if I had slipped. The first step was a real doozy.

It is medium sized and moving at great speed. It comes up dead short, turns suddenly one hundred eighty degrees and stops. The maneuver is incredible. It settles into the valley in a rather seriously controlled crash. When the craft was 30 feet off the valley floor, it suddenly slides off haphazardly to my left and impacts.

Huge explosions and heat with many fires followed. I hurry down the trail as fast as I could go without endangering myself. The trail was very steep and winding. By the time I reach the valley floor, and have cleared the rock and brush and have a clear site of the craft, it has begun to burn in several places rather frantically. The fires have not yet become critical ... although I know this is going to change quickly.

I drop my pack and my bow at the trail head. I run as fast as I can to the craft.
It is very elegant in design. Clean lines, very sleek. If I didn’t know better I would swear it was a reject from Star Wars. One side of the craft had a huge hole torn in it from a crag it had hit on crashing. It had torn a large enough gash I could easily enter the craft.

A gaping hole with smoke pouring from it beckoned to my adventurous nature. I quickly climbed into it and searched for survivors. The smoke and fire were getting worse. I knew I didn’t have much time. Fortunately, the aircraft was small.

I found the cockpit and three people. One was an extremely beautiful girl wired into some type of unknown machine and enclosed in some kind of clear cylinder. The other two were men. They were strapped into a couch of some kind and appeared to be wired into the control center of the ship itself.

I opened the end of the cylinder. It was an accident, but it was what I wanted. I unhooked the girl. Her eyes were open, but they were totally void of any consciousness. I looked into her beautiful clear blue eyes and realized there was no one looking back. They were as empty of life as any void could be. As I picked her up, her body was very limp. I checked her out and she was breathing and had a good heartbeat. Something was wrong with her, didn’t have time to worry over it, things were going from bad to worse fast.

I took her from the ship first. I placed her behind a large boulder to protect her should the aircraft explode and went back for the next passenger. The first person I came to I unstrapped from the couch and unhooked from the console. I took him to the same place I had taken the girl, which was the most fortunate thing I did I would discover later. I went back to get the last passenger. A major fire had broken out and was raging fiercely. I felt the intense heat getting closer. I unhooked him from the last panel. An alarm went off then. I turned, the cockpit was on fire and acrid smoke boiled angrily around me.

I could hear a voice repeating something over and over. It was in a completely alien language but I understood the urgency of it well. I picked him out of his seat, threw him over my back and attempted to get behind the boulder with him too. My luck had run out by this time. There was a tremendous explosion, searing heat, I was picked up along with the person on my back and painfully thrown into darkness before I had made it half way across the clearing.

When I came to, I knew immediately that I was seriously hurt. I had no arms and one of my eyes didn’t work. I also knew I was in a place no one on earth would believe. This place looked like something out of a first rate top notch science fiction flick.

The first man I had saved noticed I was awake and came to me. He put something on my forehead. It made a strange tingling sensation inside my head. He attached the same type of device to his forehead. He said something that was totally alien to me. I told him I didn’t understand. He repeated himself. I didn’t quite understand, but it was almost English and some of the words I could easily guess.

My response was just the word, “What?”

This time, when he spoke, it was perfect English. The voices of the others in the room were now also perfect English.

He said, “Hello, my name is Thomas. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for saving Amy and for saving me. I am truly sorry you have been so seriously injured.”

I asked, “How is the man that was on my back when that thing exploded?”

Thomas looked very grieved and the response was full of emotional overtones. He said, “Prince Blake was torn to pieces by the explosion. You were saved by his body being draped over your back. The portions of your body that were not covered by his were torn to pieces. My entire race thanks you for your sacrifice.”

He moved a mirror above me and I saw my body was mutilated. I had no legs or arms. From just below what used to be my waist down no longer existed. I was missing an eye and my face was totally disfigured. What was left of me was burned to a crisp. Fortunately, I felt no pain. I wondered what he meant by “his entire race”.

Thomas looked at me for a moment then said, “Amy is very special to me. She is perhaps the most important person in my life. Her body is completely intact due to your heroic actions. Her brain is also intact along with all her life memories. It’s just … well … due to the failure we encountered, her essence is no longer with us.”

I was even more puzzled about all of this and asked, “What are you saying? I did see her eyes were very empty when I rescued her.”

Thomas said, “Everything about her corporeal body is intact. It’s that … well … ummm … let us just say her soul is lost to this reality and there is nothing to give animation to the living flesh.”

A shock ran through me. I understood him to say the body was alive but had no soul to animate it. I did not understand how such a thing could happen.

I asked, “Is she in a coma?”

Thomas replied, “No, the lights are on, just no one is home.” He bows his head and rubs his eyes tiredly and continues, “We cannot repair your body nor keep your body from expiring, nor can we bring her essence back. You will die, and she will be a vegetable if things are left to run their course.”

I was not happy to hear that I was dying. I knew this was the outcome any way because of the severity of my injuries. I was still extremely puzzled. I knew earth had no such technology like what I was seeing. I understood the statement, “His entire Race”

Thomas spoke again with more emotion in his voice, “There is something we can do however. I am not giving you the choice to say no, because Amy is excessively important to me. You have a living essence and a dead body. She is a living body with no essence. There will be issues for you at first. It will pass if you allow it to. There will be many people to help you through the rough parts. You will be deeply loved and pampered for the rest of your long life. I will help you as much as I can through the double memories until you let them go.”

I was totally confused now and asked, “What are you talking about? Double memories?”

Thomas looked like he was about to tell me, then thought better of it. He took the device from my forehead and all the voices became totally alien again. He walked away.

I was scared. I felt no pain. I could feel my life slipping away towards death. Some people came to me and started attaching electrodes to what was left of me. Some kind of gold ring was placed over my head. I could feel a really strange chill course through my soul as it was put on my head. There was some kind of detachment from my body and my consciousness that made me feel real spooky. I knew I was dying.

One of the people working on me put that device on my forehead again. I heard him say, “This will be extremely beyond anything you have ever experienced before in your life.” Every thing began to echo and took on a far away aspect as things were getting fuzzy. He continued, ” Your body will die in about 10 minutes so we have to hurry. After scanning your memories, we find you are the perfect specimen and this will fulfill a childhood fantasy for you. I know fantasizing it and living it are different, but don’t be scared. This process will all be over soon and you will recover completely. There will be issues, and it will be entirely up to you how long it takes for you to get past them. Enjoy your new lease on life.”

He then removed the thing from my forehead and I could no longer understand anything anyone said. I was totally confused and truly about to panic. I didn’t understand the new lease on life thing. I truly understood this; I was dying and didn’t like it.
I faded away.

Us

I felt it hit me. I came totally awake. It coursed through me like a hurricane filled with electrical fire. It grabbed my soul and suddenly there was a total separation of my consciousness from my body.
I was aware of my body ... it was alone and in the most horrible hell spawned torment imaginable because of the injuries to it ... it was only a moment from death … but I felt nothing except the coursing energy that held me and pulled me from my destroyed body. I saw it perish in the most horrible agony, totally empty and void.

I saw my destroyed self on the table, dead. I could see myself in this other location too, I was completely intact here. I was pulled helplessly into a blue-white field of energy. It spread through me. I actually felt something being erased from me. Wasn’t sure what. On the other side of this energy field, I was no longer in a human form, but existed as a bright white sphere of intense energy. I had been pulled into a clear sphere surrounded by this intense energy field. I could actually see what was going on in the room below, but I couldn’t get out of the sphere. The wall of energy prevented it.

I saw them unhook all the wires from my dead body, place it in a body bag and zip it closed. This caused me some anxiety to say the least. I knew I was dead, but still somehow alive. Next, they brought the girl to the table and placed her nude body on it. They attached the electrodes in the same fashion I had been wired and placed the golden ring on her head.

She is an extremely beautiful eighteen year old. She had a choke collar around her neck that had the most beautiful blue gemstone I had ever seen. She was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen as well. Shoulder length silky white blond hair and the face of an absolute angel.

I see one of the people push a button on a panel. I am grabbed by the irresistible hurricane filled with electrical fire force again. My thoughts are totally disrupted as I am placed in the girl’s body. I don’t fit ... some kind of adjustment. I’m back ... this time I fit perfectly.

My body was very glad to have me back. I didn’t understand, this isn’t my body ... it is my body and my soul rejoiced that I had returned to it again. The body accepted me, my soul accepted my body, my body caressed me, became me, and I became her. The way I had entered this body suddenly vanished with the energy wave and I was now an eighteen year old little girl and a fifty one year old man all at the same time with extremely intense dual conflicting tormenting memories all fighting for control. I was merged. No foundation of who I was. No basis or concept of reality.

Neuro Control Diagnostic ... control vector loss ... reestablish Pet program control

My soul is grabbed by an all consuming merciless controlling force ... it is demanding ... it is irresistible ... it takes absolute control ... I loose my free will. I scream a blood curdling scream of intense agony as the neuro pet collar reestablished absolute pitiless control over me. Just as quickly, I become silent as waves and waves of really strange and intense emotions, thoughts, feelings, desires, needs, hopes, and an over powering need to please engulf me. I open my eyes ... Total disoriented torment ... I scream!

I am totally confused. We are totally insane. I have massive things being forced into my existence ... I am totally tormented. I am Amy Michelle Anton. I am John Notsruht Tressu. We are both and neither. Something has taken control of our soul. We are in an extreme state of total tormented confusion. I have thoughts, emotions, feelings, things becoming me that aren’t me. Things that are us becoming things that aren’t me. I am me, but I am someone else too. I am no one, we are one, all at the same time, at absolute war with each other.

I sit up on the table. We are completely nude and freezing cold. We have wires all over us and a neurolizing halo on my head … how do I know what this ring thing is? Emotions I’ve never had before start running through me ... familiar ... alien ... total spiritual conflict. I start crying hysterically.

I can’t help it; we are literally an eighteen year old girl and a fifty one year old man together as one person in torment, at war. We have dual personality ... I have single personality ... I scream!

A woman rushes to me … she is a total stranger … I know her very well … I have never met her before … I have known her all my life … she is my mother Princess Lady Beth ... I love her intensely … our mind is tearing me apart ... she is a total stranger … who is this other person in here with me ... refusals ... denials ... war ... We are scared out of our mind … I scream in tormented fear!

The woman starts to cry miserably ... We have lost our mind and are trapped here. A man comes to me and drapes me in a warm blanket. He removes the wires and ring from me. There is intense love of this man … he is that Thomas person … he is a total stranger … I have known Daddy all my life … strange little girl hope that he won’t leave me ... I cannot believe I love a man … he is a total stranger I never saw before today … I trust him with my life ... I want and need him ... I know him and love him deeply … he is a total stranger and I fear him ... We are totally out of our mind ... more war over who is real ... I scream!

I need his safety and protection ... I am totally flabbergasted over the thoughts about this strange man ... the woman is kissing me... she is extremely beautiful ... I feel arousal in thinking of how cute she is ... I am disgusted with my thoughts about my mother ... we are in torment again … war over sexual preferences ... I scream!

Two of the people I love the most in the world are trying their best to sooth the torment and comfort me … they are total strangers I have never seen before today and are trying their level best to ease the torment and comfort me ... They talk to the madness of the other inside me and tell her to let go of ME ... I am scared beyond reason ... We have no mind...they are two people I love and trust the most in the world and I am scared … they are doing their level best to soothe my torment … We are deeply in love ... We fear for my very life ... I scream!

I am being held … I am being kissed by the man I know has loved and protected me as far back as I can remember … I am a Pet ... what is a pet ... I am a grown man ... I am a little baby ... I have nothing to keep me... she is winning … I am a girl... I can’t believe how much I love and trust this man and woman that are total strangers to me ... realization I am nude in the arms of the man and I am embarrassed ... I grab the blanket and cling to it ... I am very shy ... those thoughts are insane ... I am a grown man ... I AM a baby girl ... I start to cry pitifully.

The strange woman is caressing me and telling me how much she loves me ... she wrapped me lovingly in the warm blanket ... she is telling me she loves her baby ... They beg me to come back to them ...

I hear their words and follow the path to Amy ... the other looses the battle ... a change in the way I perceive reality ... his tormenting influence fades a bit as he lost his grip … listen to them, I am Amy ... they tell me to let go and relax … I trust these two with my very life. I know they are my daddy and my mommy.

As I obey them, the insanity becomes easier to ignore … they are total strangers that I have known all my life and totally trust and ... a major realization ... My name IS AMY… my foundation for reality ... I am an eighteen year old girl. My will plants and I take a stand ... I accept this for the moment even though it seems to be insane. I know somehow I can absolutely trust these two strangers.

I feel the intense love and trust I have for daddy and mommy ... I accept their words and the storm raging in my soul fades even more as he looses any foothold. I listen to them and follow the course that leads to a little girl called Amy ... the other is hysterical ... I push him away ... he is screaming and crying. There is a way to peace, accept the fact I am Amy ... I follow it.

The torment fades because he has nothing to sustain him. He has no foundation in reality. His screams fade to unintelligibility. Amy begins to come to her senses and madness fades.

I am trembling with fear ... I feel an injection ... I hear someone say I will sleep now … There will be no us ... I AM AMY! Comforting words, caresses, and kisses from the two well known and trusted strangers who are my daddy and mommy accompany me into blissful sleep. Soft, peaceful, torment free, no more fear … I have pleasant little girl dreams.

Amy Anton is Reborn

I open my eyes. It is dimly lit here. There are soft noises in the distance that are pleasant. I hear the soft quiet sounds of rain and distant gentle thunder. I hear music. It is so soft and soothing. I sit up and have intense memories of a dream I was having ... realization dawns, it wasn’t a dream. I am Amy ... I used to be John Though. I shake my head to clear it.

This is my bedroom ... I am comforted in knowing I am home. I grab my Teddy Bear ... wait ... this is a young girl’s bedroom not mine. There are conflicting memories again. I am two people at the same time. I am able to handle this confusion now. I know who I am and the other is nonsense. We both have to go to the bathroom. I feel safe, I am in my own bedroom with my Teddy Bear in my arms. I look around. So familiar ... so strange and new.

I start to get out of bed. I realize everything is wrong and totally right at the same time.
I am dressed in a baby doll night gown with rumba panties. My name is Amy Michelle Anton! They call me by my middle name shortened to Miki. I am an Imperial Pet. More confusion as multiple memories flood my mind as I stand up. It’s getting easier to repel the other.

A sudden overpowering very real memory of a very painful explosion accompanied by searing heat.

I stumble and fall into someone’s arms. I look up and it’s my mommy … wait ... this extremely beautiful woman is a total stranger at the same time. I know I can trust her, I remember her trying so hard to comfort me. I allow the fear to pass. I accept the conflicting memories, and then ignore him. He has no memories here. Noting to hold him here. He goes away.

She says, “Miki, are you all right? It’s so nice to have you back.” She gives me a very tender kiss and a loving hug.

All I can say, “What?” my mind is clearing.

Mom looks at me tenderly then says, “There was a serious accident on your trip with your Father, baby. Paul was killed and the dream machine malfunctioned. You were seriously injured. We have you back now and I won’t allow anything to hurt you.”

I understand what she is saying. I have memory of the trip, I feel sorrow at Paul’s death. He was always good to me and fun. I know what the dream machine is, I remember knowing it was damaged in a way no one could have ever possibly have conceived, knowing there is no way out, knowing I was going to die, the horrible pain of my consciousness being shredded, and the total icy cold blackness of oblivion.

I start to cry. Mom holds me closely and whispers how much she loves me. She wipes the tears softly from my eyes. I hug her neck and tell her how much I love her too, she starts to cry. She rocks me lovingly. We cry softly in each other’s arms.

I couldn’t help it; I was so emotional at this point I wet my panties. I am very upset about it. One side of me is disgusted I did this ... another side of me is innocently shy about it ... Mom soothes me and tells me it’s all right for a little girl to have accidents. Some confusion but I attempt not to think about it. This is what little girls do sometimes is my reply to him. He is almost gone.

She took me to potty. She took off my panties and I sat on the potty and relieved myself. Mom put my wet panties in a hamper and asked if I wanted to be diapered.

A blank confusion, all I could say was, “What?” A real thrill runs through me.

Some very mixed emotions filled the blank suddenly. The eighteen year old girl side of me very much wanted to be baby and all it meant. She really enjoyed being baby. The other side was a fifty one year old grown man saying this was impossible and was extremely disgusted at the thought of wearing baby clothes and diapers.

Mom came over and had me stand as she gently wiped my privacy. It was a thrill the way she did it. Mom smiled tenderly.

She said softly and lovingly in a strange compelling voice, “Would Amy like to be baby for awhile?”

On impulse I couldn’t understand or resist at the moment I said, “Yes.” The impulse was overwhelming and made me feel wonderful. I couldn’t resist. Something in mom’s voice was so comforting and filled me with trust and contentment. I love mommy so much. I need to please mommy.

I was compelled by a rush of wonderful emotions from the voice of mommy to follow Amy, not John memories. This was relief from the confusion and anguish from earlier when I attempted to follow John memories. I realized the less I attempted to be John and the more I attempted to be Amy, the less confusion and the less mental torment.

He realized this is one of those strange dream fantasies from when he was a kid come true. He cannot hang on ... he lost the battle.

I knew this was who Amy was. I knew I could absolutely trust this beautiful woman ... she was my real mother ... She was mommy ... I love and want to please mommy so badly ... I let go of the other memories and became Amy, the little nine year old girl who’s nick name is Miki, who very much wanted to be baby. I love mommy and will please her to the best of my ability. I am Miki. I know this to be true. Mommy is very pleased with Miki. THIS IS WHO I AM! All vestiges of torment ended abruptly.

Mom seemed excessively strong I am a small and petite girl though. She picked me up and cooed to me as she gave me a loud smooch. I giggled happily as she swung me around and placed me on a table she had released from the wall. She blew into my belly button and made a raspberry noise as she tickled me. I giggled and kicked my feet like a little baby should. I was thinking how much fun mommy is.

I suddenly realize what I’m doing. Confusion at how I am acting like a baby. Disgust at the emotions I feel about this. I am helpless to stop. What is going on? I am willingly doing this? I love being baby! I force him away again. It was so easy to get rid of him now.

Mom seems to sense my anxiety. She rubs her nose to mine and tells me gently how much she loves baby. She tickles me softly in my ribs and I kick and squirm happily. The conflict ended as soon as it started. John left, I am baby.

Mom has me on my back and has me bend my knees and spread my legs. All I want to do at this point is to please mommy like a good baby. She rubs me all over with a sweet smelling oil. She is caressing me with each gentle pass of her hand.

Mom says softly, “We’ll make you a sweet baby.” I feel something pleasant and cold enter me. This cold and the intensely pleasant tingle it created spreads from there all through my body. She is done. I am helpless. She turns me gently on my tummy. I am becoming even more helpless and innocently euphoric. I make very sweet little girl noises as Mom coos to me and encourages me to relax and be baby. Mom begins to lovingly rub me with another wonderfully scented oil. The feeling is incredibly, intensely euphoric. I feel a tingling warm wetness spread through out my body and gain in intensity with each soft caress of mom’s hands. This sensation by no means detracts from the tingling cold that has spread through me.

I feel all the tension and fear going away as my mind slips into a wonderful simple innocent euphoria. I am baby ... I am helpless to think beyond this, babies don’t know how.

Baby

Mom turns me over on my back and tickles me again. I giggle happily and squeal and kick and squirm.

Mom kisses me again and says, “Miki, you are an adorable baby.”

She lifts me by my heels and places a very soft diaper under me and sets me on it. It is very soft and very warm and excessively thick. She powders me ... I smell honeysuckle. She rubs and caresses me gently... I love mommy. She kisses me again and tells me how much she loves me and no one will ever hurt me again. She tickles the bottom of my feet ... I squeal in delight. She pins the diaper on me. She puts a plastic lined rumba panty on me and then hugs and kisses me some more.

“Come with me baby“, she says to me and turns to finish cleaning up for a second.

I go to get off the table and discover suddenly things are different for me now. I am drastically different now than I was before she put me in diapers. I can’t do this ... I need mom’s help so I don’t fall off the table and hurt myself. I don’t know how to get off the table and loose my balance ... I am falling. I am helpless to stop myself and I’m going to get seriously hurt. Mom immediately is there and catches me. “Be careful, Miki” she cautions, “You are a little baby now and have different needs.”

I realize suddenly I have started sucking my thumb. I stop.

I have a sudden attack of confusion, dual memories fight for dominance for a second. He has nothing to stand on or to grab ... I am a little baby girl now. Nothing he is doing or says makes any sense to me or even matters. Babies don’t understand those kind of things. There is absolutely no understanding or interest in me and he can do nothing. I am innocent and he can do nothing here. I am confused a little. Mom realizes this and is there with hugs and caresses that comfort and sooth the anxiety away. This is important. I love mommy.

I have some difficulty walking normally. I find myself unable to keep up with mommy. Mom gently holds my hand and walks slowly as I follow her into a room ... it’s a nursery complete with a crib and toys and everything a baby girl could ever need or want.

Mom sits in a big thick rocking chair ... I am so over joyed. I come up to her and she lifts me into her lap. I am lying in her lap looking into her extremely beautiful face. I am totally lost in the warm glow of mommy’s love. She smiles and hugs me again. “It’s so nice to have you back Miki, I love you so much”, she said as she kissed me again.

She undid her top so quickly I didn’t realize what was coming until it came. My mind was loosing itself in the simple euphoria that was engulfing me. She took out one of her beautifully formed breasts and gave it a small squeeze. A white drop appeared on her nipple and she put that to my mouth. I started to object as another dual memory tried to take over. No foundation for him in any way. The taste of the milk on my lips and I was helpless and started to suckle. This was important. Breakfast. Baby understands she is hungry. Not that other noise. Baby suckles and is content.

Mom smiled and cooed to me again and said lovingly, “Just relax and be baby. It will help you to recover from the accident.” She said. “I can’t even imagine what you are going through, sweet heart. It must be bad to be two people at the same time. I know you know you can trust me. You can absolutely trust your daddy too. Listen to us and let go of that other, the one your daddy calls John. You are not him. That is part of the accident and you will recover if you just let go. Come back and be my Baby Miki. She is loved very much by a whole lot of people.”

The milk was warm, very rich, tasted very good, and it definitely satisfies the hunger in my tummy. I was immediately content. Things all blurred into a large happy euphoric loving contentment.

I don’t know when I fell asleep, but when I awoke, I was in my crib and needed a diaper change. I couldn’t believe I had peed in my diaper. I tried to take it off ... I didn’t know how, I needed mommy. I remembered what she said about letting go ... I let go of the other memories and was Baby Amy. I held the crib’s rail as I stood up. I was shaky on my feet. I saw myself in the mirror. I was truly an adorable baby girl. I looked like an Angel.

I could feel myself making a stinky in my diaper and couldn’t help but push it out.
It made a big impression on me that I was unable to stop myself. I could feel it in my diaper as it grew until I pushed once more and was finished. I had just made a messy in my diaper. There was absolutely nothing I could do to prevent it. I am an unpotty trained baby.

I called, “Mommy, Miki go potty.” I was shocked at how my voice sounded. Adorably sweet, I sound like that? Let go, you are Baby Amy.

Mom came in the room and picked me up and checked my diaper. She kissed me and said, “Miki you are such a good baby going potty in your diaper.”

She gave me a big hug and a real tender kiss and lots of encouragement to be baby as she laid me on the changing table.

She said, “I thought I would never get to do this again. I am so glad they were able to bring you back.” She kisses me.

She took off my wet messy diaper and washed me. She put jell lovingly around my privacy and bottom, Powdered and re-diapered me. She took off my nighty top and put me in a cute romper with a plastic lining and three rows of ruffles on my bottom and snapped it between my legs. She put matching booties on my feet ... I giggle happily.

She sat in the big rocker with me lovingly in her arms, and I suddenly had her breast in my mouth. It felt so good and made me feel very safe and content. The milk filled my tummy. The memories of John were gone.

When I had finished breakfast, she took me into the den where many people were. There were Princes, administrators, Kings, Senators, Arbiters of Imperial Law all carrying on about some huge important thing. I felt very self conscious about being dressed as a baby. Everyone seemed to accept that I was a baby girl and treated me accordingly with much love, encouragement, and acceptance. Everyone knew me, I didn’t know any of them.

I began a new life ... I was baby.
Miki Yamuri
 
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